Self Defense for the Robot Apocalypse

Marcus Kowal shows you how to kick robot butt.

My trainer, the amazing Marcus Kowal, shows me how to take down crappy metal jerk faces with 8 simple self defense moves for the robot apocalypse. Everything from kick to the groin to choke from behind to eye gouge to bear hug…er… robot hug. If you watch this video, I’m really excited to hang out with you after the robot have killed everyone that didn’t!


loud smackOHHHH, dude!

That one actually hurt curse words Ali laughing God intense action music *Hey best pal-y, I’m AliAnd I’m Marcus Kowal He is a very knowledgeable Krav Maga instructor and this is an angry robot. *smack groans and laughter We all know that the impending robot takeover is inevitable So, Marcus is going to teach me how to survive the apocalypse by defending myself against these metal a**holes. intense action music The key when it comes to kicking the groin, especially when it comes to robots, is to hit the metal rod. Alright?

Ok. So, as you come up you want to drive your hips into it You actually want to come from more under and up as you pop for that kick. Ok. Let’s see if you can try it a couple times on the robot. Ok. smack ACCESS DENIED!robot groans That’s good!I think we got it. intense action music When the robot gets too close, especially if it’s a rapist robot,Yeah. You want to make sure that it’s a short range weapon that you’re utilizing You can use your elbow right here and what you want to try to aim for is the robot nose They’re very sensitive. And you want to hit it, driving in this way. Like so. Make sure you pivot, driving your hip and shoulder into it. So, if you come around. . . your turn. Bravo!Rapist robot coming at you!smack DOES NOT COMPUTE!That’s really good!Thank you, thank you. I’m feeling safer already. Ali laughs intense action music Sometimes, being safe is getting out of the situation. I mean, sometimes they just continually lumber towards me. Yes. So, what do we do in that situation?Well, I would use one of these ’cause you can escape, right?If you throw this out. Throw the next one out thud Good! Ali laughing intense action music The most common attack known to man is the choke from behind. So, if you do it to me really quick I wanna show you how to get out of it. So, first you wanna make sure to get rid of those robot thumbs that are causing the choke. You’re gonna basically rake the hands by the thumbs, strike towards their robot groin,Elbow upwards and then you’re gonna turn and strike. So, if a robot was actually coming at you. . . Alright smack smack smack FK YOU, SKYNET! intense action music. A good weapon to use against a certain type of robot is the eye gouge. You wanna separate your fingers, just like you were throwing a punch before. You’re gonna strike in towards the eyes. You’re basically raking into the eyes with your fingers. Like so. Got it. So, I’m not sure what kind of model this is but try the eye gouge. Ok, come here ya jerk. Oh, it’s not working?It doesn’t seem to be working. Alright, spray him with water. *thud Ali laughing**intense action music*Normally, these are called bear hugs. Mhm. But in this case it’s a robot hug. Right! Got it. First thing you want to do is get ready so right when the person is grabbing you. Grab me around my arms here is to lower your waist, bring your hips down and push on the robot hips, then start ______What works really good against humans is biting ears, neck, face Doesn’t work as well against robots.

What do you want, robot? LOVE! There you go!Strike in the groin! Good!There you go! Create distance. I CANNOT LOVE!Ali laughing intense action music If you recognize the attack from a distance. All you have to do is set off an electromagnetic pulse loud clack thud intense action music*If none of the other things are working, you can always wear his batteries out by a robot dance-off. *techno music thud Nice!Yes!Take a look at the view count on this video because that’s the number of people that will be on the planet with us after the robots try and take over. You are now a part of an elite group I am very excited to hang out with you once, ya know, everyone else is dead at the claws of artificial intelligence. For actual Krav Maga training you should check out what he does with Systems Training Center If you don’t live in Los Angeles and you’re not able to train with us here,you can always go to Your KravMaga. com where we’ll also teach you realistic self defense techniques. It’s so hot in here!Is it hot in here or is it just this robot?

You might be interested in

Leave a Reply